Same thing we face

I used to see myself as the most fragile, I was the one who hurt by people, got bruises and painful. My life was the most fucked up. Life’s never been easy. They’re also hurt. Absolutely. I try to see them also as fragile as I am

About December

What I love about december is the rain.

December

I imagined my birthday would be like, me binge watch a serial on Netflix, play Superstar all day and sleep earlier. I was born premature, needed to be in incubator for few days. They said I was tiny like a mouse. Spent almost all life on gloomy shits. Each of us got our moments when […]

Siklus

Untuk semua yang pernah hilang dan kehidupan membawanya kembali. Untuk rasa yang pernah luka dan waktu meyembuhkannya. Untuk takut yang pernah selalu ada dan damai menggantikannya. Pelan-pelan ya

Promise

I forget when it exactly started. I was in first grade and it was my first year in this city. My aunt promised to buy me a doll, I didn’t believe her. Short time later she really bought me one. What shocked me is because she kept her promise. In my mind, since young age, […]

Bahasa

Suatu siang, tanpa basi basi, gatau apinya dari mana tau tau ada asap, si ibu ibu bilang, ngapain belajar bahasa inggris toh ga dipakai di akhirat. Di akhirat pakai bahasa apasi emang? bahasa arab? Pas ditanya “Tuhanmu siapa?”, karna aku belajarnya bahasa inggris bukan bahasa arab jadi aku bakal diem aja ntar di akhirat gitu […]

Past

Dig up old stories would hurt you instead. Back in time 10 years ago, isn’t it? Let past stay in graveyard, cover by leaves fell from kamboja tree. Or you wanna see it alive to be a zombie, suck your blood, kill you in silence. Open playlist, choose River flows in you, Yiruma’s song. Have […]

Him

First time in years my father’s father come to house. Not only him. His other sons and daughters. Before this I forgot their existence. I thought my father only had himself. He never hates them even an inch. He never hates anybody. I hate him. From him I learn not to forgive. From him I […]

Udalah

Please stop kasian kasian! Jadi dulu pas ojol baru ada gatau kenapa ya orang-orang kesannya kayak itu pekerjaan kelas bawah. Hell why? Ada temen. Pas kami lagi di jalan dia ngomong “ih kasiannya” dengan intonasi nada beneran sedih gitu, yang dia maksud adalah si ojol. Ga ada perkerjaan yang menyedihkan terlebih untuk dikasihani.

Tentang apa.

Belakangan ngerasa semua pilihan-pilihan yang diambil ga tepat. Satu dua hal rasanya salah. Tengah malam pas semua orang sudah tidur dan yang tersisa cuma suara dari benda-benda elektronik, waktu ke-rasa damai, sisa aku dan dunia. Nyambi ngucapin mantra “gpp, aku cukup”. Suka terenung pas tengah malam, cari-cari jawaban untuk yang dirasa salah padahal ga bener-bener […]